Pontius Pilot: Community

THE GOOD: Joel McHale on primetime! Joel McHale on primetime! After supremely mixed feelings about his appearance on the defunct pilot for the US take on "The IT Crowd" (how could a virtual line-by-line remake be so unfunny?), I am now free to bask in the possibility of enjoying the hysterical host of "Talk Soup" on a show that doesn't feature a regular segment about what crazy ass shit Tyra's talking about this week.

The show also features an excellent ensemble comprised of Chevy Chase, a hot blonde, a hot (but uptight) brunette, a sassy black lady, a kid with Aspergers (he's my favorite), that British dude from "The Daily Show" and a young jock dude who used to write for "30 Rock" (he's my second favorite). Oh and Ken Jeong.

THE BAD: The airwaves (and my American Airlines flight from TX last week) have been saturated with ads for the show. In addition to getting lots of people to tune in, it also gave away most of the jokes. I think that's why a lot of the pacing felt a little flat to me; I knew exactly where we were going. That's not to say I didn't laugh really hard at everything out of Abed's mouth.

THE VERDICT: It'll get better. The "30 Rock" pilot wasn't as good and now it's the most hilarious thing on TV.*

*Not including the crazy ass shit Tyra's talking about this week.

Pontius Pilot: The Vampire Diaries

THE GOOD: With Dawson's Creek and Hidden Palms (forgot about that one, didn't you?), Kevin Williamson made the mistake of giving us just a handful of central characters. That makes for very tight, very frustrating little love triangles. With The Vampire Diaries, we've got a plethora of characters: Elena, her two friends (witchy Bonnie and needy...blonde girl), her two vampire love interests (broody Stefan and delightfully evil Damon), her self-medicating brother (and his former hook-up), her ex-boyfriend (Hey, don't I know you from Friday Night Lights?) and his kinda date-rapey best friend. Plus two adults that no one really cares about.

There's already a lot of interpersonal drama and that's BEFORE Damon showed up to start killing off locals (Jesse from Degrassi, we'll miss you) and torture his brother. Speaking of Degrassi (and you know I love to), TeenMom is actually good as Elena. She could easily be a mopey and pensive (and she is a little, I mean, her parents did just die), but TeenMom finds a way to elevate her, making her likable and tough. She won't crumble when her world is ripped wide open (and if Damon's half the vampire I think he is, he will rip that shit WIDE open), she'll rip a bottle out of her brother's hand, cracks it on a table and fight the hell back.

THE BAD: Stefan looks really old. I get that he's been hanging out since the mid 19th century, but really? When Elena ran into him outside the men's bathroom, I half expected her to be like "Oh I think you're looking for the teacher's lounge." I (kind of) get why the Cullens in Twilight hide out in high school; they were all under 20 when they died. But Stefan seems like he was older, right? Or maybe he just looks like it.

Also potentially lame is the whole Civil War thing they're doing. Apparently in the books, the brothers became vamps in Renaissance Italy. The TV adaptation has them being changed in Elena's hometown, Mystic Falls, during the Civil War. You know, the war that pitted brother against brother? Symbolism! This could go a couple of different ways, it could be kind of interesting and murky or it could be totally black-and-white and lame all over.

THE VERDICT: DVR Season Pass. Only to be watched while on the elliptical. Or eating a tub of ice cream.

Pontius Pilot: Melrose Place

THE GOOD: I didn't hate Katie Cassidy on Supernatural, but I also didn't mind when she was replaced with that chick from Wildfire. So let's just say I wasn't expecting to fall in love with her as Melrose Place's token bitch. And yet I totally did. I wasn't a fan of first Melrose incarnation so I don't know if Heather Locklear's Amanda had a heart under all that hairspray and menace, but Cassidy's Ella does and it beats only for Noah, her goofy filmmaker buddy. He's newly engaged to Riley, a sweet teacher who doesn't quite believe in him as much as his fierce publicist/manager/agent. I think the reason I love Noah and Ella the most is that they're the most fully formed characters; I know real life versions of them.

There are other promising characters. Auggie the chef is nice and brooding and though he seemed to love dead Sydney the most, he was also the one burning bloody clothes before we cut to credits. Struggling young doctor Lauren is starting down the slippery slope to whoredom, which is good since she has such an awesome bedside manner. And Michael's son David seems fun, even if he is an art thief, which is a little bit hilarious.

THE BAD: Oh Ashlee Simpson-Wentz. Maybe she'll be better after the pilot. Her character is the shoe-horned in new neighbor that finds dead Sydney in the pool. She then has an awkward Backstory Betty convo with Auggie about his sobriety and very oddly encourages Lauren to be a hooker. She basically comes off as a huge creep. And not in an "Ooh I wonder what her secret is" way, but like a "Please get killed off soon" way.

While I like Veronica Marsiness of the murder mystery, Sydney Andrews is no Lilly Kane. So far, she's just a pathetic cougar of a landlord who populated her old stomping grounds with a new generation of hotties in hopes of reliving her glory days. Though it showed foresight to rent to another crazy redhead before shuffling off the mortal coil.

THE VERDICT: DVR Season Pass.