Jake Kane in the bedroom with a revolver

Hidden Palms is over. Yawn. Cliff was so trustworthy and sweet the whole episode that I was totally prepared (and excited) for him to get away with murder. Then the mention of Skip's long ago affair with Maria (and let's face it, the proximity of Secor as a shady dad) made me wonder if Greta and Eddie were half siblings. It would have given us a reason as to why he was boffing secret BFF Liza (he could no longer stomach the wooden affection of his half-sis!). And it would have given Greta Blah Blah Boringcakes a motive. Sort of.

Greta as the killer is about the only thing that would have redeemed her in my eyes. But, of course, she was an unwitting bystander in the murder(s) and the cover-up(s), just as she is in life. A catalyst and a whiner, but not a girl of action, that one.

The series was wrapped up fairly tidily with a bit too much happily ever after for anything with such a moody title sequence and so much freaking suicide. Bob and Mom are going to be married forever, Cliff and Nikki are going to give a plain ol’ dysfunctional teenage relationship a shot, Liza and Greta hugged and apparently Johnny’s now over his dad’s death. Or something. Oh and Skip will no doubt be brought to justice for the 2-3 murders he carried out.

Even with its literal bang, Hidden Palms sputtered its last breath, skidding to a halt as it ran low on different ways for Johnny to be led astray by people he should seriously not trust. I'll miss Cliff, Nikki and Leslie Jordan. Dog kicking, alcoholism and stone sober drag queen-ery has never been so fun.